EVEN BETTER WITH: Ashley Neese

breathwork earth angel on earning trust, finding slowness even when it's hard, genuinely accessible nervous system regulation & a lotttt of protein

today’s guest is a deeply special person and practitioner ashley neese who is a breathwork teacher and author (i own and love both her books very much). i have known ashley for a long time, and her breathwork has been completely expansive for me. it is a total treat and delight to have her here today. she shares:

- how she helps people come home to themselves through breath

- tips for someone who hasn’t done breathwork before but would like to start

- protein as a pillar of her self care practice and some of her gorg meals and go-to’s

- her non-negotiables for nervous system regulation & the daily herb syrup she takes for nervous system support

- a vulnerable share that moved me deeply about her way in to this work and how it’s shaped her practice

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How would you describe what you do?

I support people who are ready for something different—folks who’ve done the therapy, read the books, maybe even tried breathwork before, but still feel stuck. They’re often highly creative, deeply caring, and so busy holding everything together that they’ve lost touch with what their body is trying to tell them.

My work is about creating spaces—through breathwork, through writing, through community—where we can remember how to breathe again. That might look like writing about leaving social media, guiding a client through Regenerative Breathwork™, or simply sitting with someone’s grief that’s been waiting just below the surface for years.

My practice is shaped by our three kids, a small herd of rescue horses, and the rugged land we tend in the Sierras. Parenting and adoption have stretched me in ways that are hard to put into words, while the daily work of earning the trust of a traumatized child—or horse—reminds me that healing is never quick. It’s slow, relational, and built on consistent attunement.

At its core, everything I do is about helping people come home to themselves. Sometimes that means reconnecting with parts of ourselves we’ve been avoiding; sometimes it’s finding steadiness in the chaos of parenting, or simply giving ourselves permission to pause. Healing doesn’t happen in optimization or in getting everything “right.” Healing happens in relationships—with our bodies, with each other, and with the natural world.

I talk a lot about nervous system regulation in my practice - it’s often at the core of why my clients make decisions that don’t feel aligned with their future/best selves. What advice would you give to someone who hasn’t done breathwork on how to begin? How does it differ from other modes of nervous system regulation such as meditation, yoga, stretching?

Start super simple: pause for three conscious breaths. That’s it. Once that feels doable, begin sprinkling those three breaths into everyday moments—while washing dishes, before you pick up your phone, or when your child is mid-meltdown. It doesn’t have to be more complicated than that.

What I love about breathwork is how immediate and portable it is. You don’t need a yoga mat, a meditation cushion, or twenty minutes of silence (though that’s wonderful if you can get it). Your breath is always with you, and it’s the fastest way I know to shift your nervous system state. While meditation asks you to observe your thoughts and yoga moves energy through the body, breathwork works directly with the autonomic nervous system—you’re literally changing your body’s chemistry in real time.

I think of the breath as a bridge between the conscious and unconscious mind. When I’m overwhelmed by parenting three kids while running a business, I can’t think my way into calm. But I can breathe my way there. A few rounds of longer exhales than inhales, and suddenly I can respond instead of react.

The beauty is there’s no way to fail at this—you’re already breathing. We’re just bringing some attention to what your body has been doing on its own for years. Start with three breaths, return to them often, and let that be enough.

You told a very honest story about peeing on the floor of a hotel because you were so tired and burnt out you couldn’t make it to the bathroom - what questions did you ask yourself when that happened that helped you get to the root of what needed to change in your life? What changes did you make?